Weekly Bumming Stick


Easy choice this week, to be honest I’m a little surprised I haven’t pole arsed this smarmy, self righteous chinless wonder before. I’ve got half an inkling that the years of public school will have prepared this fuckers sphincter for the intrusion though, it’s going to be a bit like throwing a chipolata down the M1.

David Cameron, Current Prime Liar, leader of the Conservative Party and Officially Elected Rupert Murdoch Arse-ToungeĀ  boy, you know who you are.

So in what has come as a complete shock to all in the fair isle it turns out the tabloid press are a bunch of lying cunts. The great British only had to pay six million to find this out too, what a fucking bargain eh? Next year I propose we set up an inquiry to find out if our politicians are a bunch of money wasting self important wank grenades. I reckon we could find out for about four million, watch the pennies and all that. What does the feckless fop decide to do with the six million quids worth of advice and recommendations? Ignore it of course.

Desperate not to offend or upset the fallacious fuckers who put him in power in the first place, Chief Cunt starts warbling and bleating about freedom of the press and the difficulty or regulating what is obviously a very difficult to regulate form of media. It’s not that hard David, if they get caught out lying fine them or throw them in prison, job fucking done. But that’s not the real problem is it? The real problem is that these smug, sanctimonious, peddlers of shit who formulate the everyday mans’ opinion on everything, from political allegiance to what fucking insect some spunk target on I’m a Cunt Get Me Out Of Here should eat next, don’t really feel like being interfered with. Best not to rock the cart and let the Liberals take the fucking rap for it eh David?

In an ironic twist, I’d wrap the stick up in rolled up old copies of the News of The World. Not to soften the blow you understand, but to add some much needed girth in case we lose the Bumming Stick for good. The only way to get passed his layers of security and eagle eyed bodyguards, would be to disguise myself as Rupert Murdoch himself and gain access to his inner sanctum. ‘Oh G’day Davey, what this me ol’ cobber? It’s just my tabloid stick. Do me a favour mate and bend over I fancy fucking you again. Yeah. With this stick. I’m gonna bum ya with this MASSIVE stick.’

8 Comments

Filed under Weekly Bumming Stick

8 responses to “Weekly Bumming Stick

  1. Daisy

    Pseudo intellectualism garnished with toilet humour and anti-establishment vitriol. Well done son, for trying to understand important issues. It’s such a pity you’re an unfunny asshat. I dislike the Tories, not as much as labour, and certainly not as much as I dislike your attempts at blogging. In fact, I detest, your rabble so much I’ll probably vote for Cameron in 2015 just to spite you.

  2. MIke

    Just when you thought liberalism couldn’t get any more stupid, some cunt comes and proves everyone wrong.

  3. You fucking bore.

    It’s funny when somebody who uses lots of swear words and angry ranting is a pussy ass liberal. Stop trying to act hard when you have the politics of a spineless douche.

  4. Proud brit

    why all the hate for d blog… camerons a cunt! typical posh wnker with no grasp of what the public want or nead!…soft on asylum seakers an hard on the proud workin class ppl that made this country great….we need some national pride and a leader with the balls to get us out of europe stop all d immigrents and provide proper funds for our brave boys oversees.

  5. Oi Nick Griffin tuck your balls back in between your thighs and calm the fuck down!

    The really funny thing is… Folk are reading a year old post and coming out swinging in defence of David Cameron, calling me a liberal pussy etc and not one single fucker has looked one post down and come to the aid of poor old Mother Teresa!

    Which just goes to prove my point really… If folk prefer Cameron to Teresa she really must have been a horrible dessicated conker faced cunt.

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