Jizz on a Journo


As the media represents half of the world’s supply of cum swilling fuckpig cunts, I want to make a habit of at least once a month hosing some of the wankbombs down with my prescription medication riddled jizz.

We’ll start with the wankers’ short sighted uncreative use of the worlds daily events to try to push their own bland, biased view of the world down our ever vomiting throats. These cunts get themselves stuck in little cycles, like spastic hamsters caught on a never ending exercise wheel of bullshit, unable to take their eyes off the cash prize and report honestly and impartially for even two minutes. They have to try re-hash stories they think will sell rather than actual news. This is immediately noticeable when we look at the latest case of repetitive news selling.

Trapped Miners…not satisfied with the happy ending and utterly successful rescue of their ten minute a night Chile segment; the cunts have trawled the world looking for more of the incarcerated dirt diggers. Cunting Christ! Who actually gives a fuck?! These blokes work underground, eat underground, drink underground and probably bum each other to within an inch of their miserable muck filled lives underground. Now they’re trapped and may possibly die underground. Good. At least they’ll die doing something they love rather than raping Mother Earth, the coal stealing heartless bastards. Once the Oakley sunglasses sponsored Chilean miners were released, the media quickly found some more trapped in New Zealand and then China, latching onto every facet of the saga, desperately interviewing each miners wife, mistress and old school teachers in order to introduce more scandal into the scenario. Miners have been getting stuck underground for fucking centuries, only now they’re selling papers do we need to know all of their bastard names and life stories. Twenty nine miners lost in New Zealand… Twenty nine in China…Wait twenty nine in each?! Coincidences like that are not coincidences, it’s God telling us that all journalists are soulless, unimaginative and bitterly failed authors who couldn’t be arsed making up separate numbers for separate incidents…either that or it’s a coincidence.

So for this inaugural Jizz on a Journo, I jizz on them all! Bathe in it you lying fucking cumbaths.

3 Comments

Filed under Jizz on a Journo

3 responses to “Jizz on a Journo

  1. stetrasonic

    So hang on let me get this right – you have dedicated a ‘section’ of your blog to criticise recent examples of shit journalism whose only purpose is to dramatize events, create interest and ultimately create profit? Surely, in order to comment on this jornalism you have to consume it therefore doing exactly what the journalist wants you to do?

    Christ, you really are a mother fucker. I mean that in the critical sense as no doubt you are a spotty little virgin wanking furiously 10 times a day you pathetic little shit – hate the bollocks people like you come out with – you have no idea how the world works so who the fuck are you to pass any sort of judgement?

    • I will address the main thrust of your critique…

      You massively underestimate me if you think I only wank furiously 10 times a day… I ejaculate at least 26 times a day, not including dry ejaculate or cum dust, as I like to call it.

      I only feel guilty for about a quarter of these. Even then, it’s not the kind of guilt that would stop me watching the news or buying a shit newspaper with which to mop up the stale cum and blood that is a result of said wankathons.

Got something to say dickwad?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s